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"Today, I barely survived. It felt like a horror film where I was being dragged into a dark abyss. I wanted to go Viola Davis on the fam. Grab my purse and walk out. I nearly tapped out of this house." These are the words I wrote recently on an Instagram post. I did not think this would be the starting point discussing parenting struggles, but I think this best describes how so many feel at some point in their parenting journey. Motherhood is beautiful, but it can also be messy. I am so glad every time I see videos where women speak authentically about their parenting struggles. I think about the many moms who sometimes feel they want to tap out of their families, no matter how much we love them. There are so many great mothers who wake up every day with the intention of giving our best to our children only to realize that despite our best efforts, some days just suck. At the end of it all, we just have to keep giving our best , because that is really all we can do. Parenting is not for the faint and you will never get it right all the time, so be ready to get it wrong sometimes. To those of us surviving parenthood and need some answers, let's discover the some ways we can keep trying. For when the kiddos just won't listen Even the best children can have their worst day, and I say, hold on for dear life. Whether we're talking about trying to get the kid(s) out the door, telling your child for the fourth time to take her socks off the living room floor or just requesting personal space so you won't be touched out, there are moments when your kids just don’t or won’t listen. It is the nature of motherhood. In spite of my vast experience as a babysitter/nanny, some days I am still dumbfounded by the things my children do. Recently, I just had to ask one of my daughters to please step away from me, because her behavior at that moment was just unacceptable and I found myself repeating things over and over (worst mistake ever). When I felt like I was about to lose it, she had to come back with a snarky response. At that point, I directed her to her father and walked into my room. I asked Google for solutions to my problem. Yes, I was asking Google for directions to that place on the internet where successful moms reside with alternative solutions, because that's where I was at. In addition, I remembered another strategy from being a substitute teacher. It always got the kids' attention. Online Solution: If you hear me, touch your nose. (continue by naming a different body part each time until they show they're listening). My solution:  I say : 1,2,3 eyes on me. They say: 1, 2 eyes on you. So now I have two solutions that I plan to implement. Both methods, I believe, will prevent you the parent from snapping at your kid(s), give you some time to think, and allow you to convey your initial request thoughtfully and concisely. For when your child is being resistant. I have a nine year old and a seven year old, and personality wise, they couldn't be more different from each other, yet maintain some behaviors that make me question whether I am parenting one child. My second child who started off extremely introverted, is now my is strong-willed, critical thinker, who is both witty and funny. She hates being rushed to accomplish anything, so her resistance tends to be easier to solve. I back off showing remorse for my actions and correct my behavior. My nine year old on the other hand is at the developmental stage of preadolescence. I can see the push back coming from a place of desiring more autonomy, which is expected for a child her age. I have very clear house rules, expectations and structure, but I also need to recognize that I my parenting style has to match her developmental stage. I may just not be hitting the mark sometimes. Resistant behavior tends to occur when children want to avoid a task, gain attention and even gain power by trying to irritate you. Beyond these simple explanations for non-compliant behavior, it is crucial to assess the environmental changes that may be contributing to the changes in your child's behavior. Things like relocating, the death of a loved one, starting a new school, and any change in the dynamics of their home life. These factors all have an impact on children and the ways they cope with these changes. For resistant children, there are two things I try to avoid: Power struggles: Avoid going back and forth or over explaining your stance. All it does is incite more anger and resistance. Boy have I made that mistake, but I am learning. Overreacting: Try to stay to calm (and trust me, I know how difficult that can be sometimes), because it really gnaws away at the relationship between you and your child. At times it may be hard not to, but find ways to calm yourself in that moment, because reacting may be more disastrous than you think. What you can do to help you avert many negative situations is: Praise your child for the things they do well: I pay attention my children's actions, so when I see great behavior being displayed, I will point it out to my kids immediately. There are so many times I have told my daughters, "I really like how you handled that situation" by repeating what was said and how effective it was responding in the manner that they did. You can see the joy in their eyes. Collaborate with your child: I can't tell you the number of times I have asked my children advice on how they think I should address their resistance. In those moments, I see all of us us calming down and taking moments to speak our hearts and come up with solutions. They feel empowered rather than being dominated, which is never my goal. For those big emotional moments Being a parent can take a toll. There are the day to day emotional interactions that barely cause a dent, and with the right response, they can be great bonding moments. But there are the days you can barely regulate your own emotions due to a host of issues, and you have to do your best to help a sometimes dysregulated little human find a sense of calm. It is on those days, it can feel like the world is conspiring against your joy, and mothering can take a toll on your mental health. This is why I appreciate women who know in their hearts that they are not meant for the calling of motherhood and stand firmly in their decision. So on the days when everyone is caught up in their feelings, all I try try to do is avoid making the day a complete disaster. I tell my girls when they're yelling out into the universe "My day is ruined," that they're having a tough moment; there is still time to turn it around . We always do, even though it sometimes takes us a little longer to get there. As the adults who have to lead by example (but sometimes fails epically), I say absent of any physical, emotional and psychological abuse to your child, show yourself some grace. I recommend: Removing yourself from the situation: When an environment gets extremely stressful and you feel overwhelmed, start by creating distance if you can. Breathe: Take that time to acknowledge how you feel, do some deep breathing and refocus your energy on something more positive. Decide whether you want to be happy or right: In that moment, I also decide before heading back out making sure that my language does not assign blame, but rather a path to bringing us closer together. Apologize if necessary: If feelings were hurt before your exit, come back ready to apologize. This can be the olive branch to begin conversation, especially with kids who can talk. Be ready to listen: This is the time for open dialogue. Talk to your child while connecting from a place of the heart. Really allow your child to be heard. Seek comfort from a trusted individual: Whether it's your partner, a friend or a therapist, reach out to someone you can talk to if you need further support. Continue to show yourself grace and compassion: We all have rough moments. Don't beat yourself up. You can turn this around. So, keep trying, keep laughing, and embrace the wonderful chaos that is parenting. Because at the end of the day, the art of trying is what truly makes us superheroes in the eyes of our children. Celebrate the messiness, the laughter, and the endless love that comes with being a parent. Because in the grand scheme of things, the art of trying is what truly defines us as parents – imperfectly perfect and beautifully chaotic. Now go forth, fellow parents, and conquer the world!

Imagine putting on a series for some entertainment while cleaning your home and hearing the most beautiful and eloquent words you have ever heard being spoken from your ear buds that it stops you in your tracks?! This is what happened while watching Thank You, Next , a Netflix series that seems to have a great following, because of the main character Leyla. Leyla seems to have gotten herself into a bit of a pickle and gets a kintsugi bowl as a gift, which send her into the most introspective monologue that uses kintsugi as a metaphor for healing and resilience. Leyla says: “Kintsugi… seeks to elevate the beauty and the functionality of a broken object. According to this philosophy, a break is not a loss but a new form of existence. Certain events in human life can leave deep scars that may be deemed impossible to repair. However overcoming them and fixing the damage with more valuable and stronger bonds is also part of life. Rather than discarding the broken parts of an object, they’re intentionally accentuated to make them a part of its history. This is a struggle against fragmentation. It doesn’t embrace nothingness, instead it highlights the progress from when it was first broken. Vulnerability is neither denied nor suppressed, and no aspect of life is considered a flaw. It is so valuable despite not reaching greatness.” Wow! Just wow! If we can apply the philosophy of kintsugi to our our lives and relationships—especially intimate ones—we will be able to see the beauty in our experiences. We may be fragmented, but not beyond repair. With the right kind of love—self, familial, friendship and intimate—and healing put us back together, so that we may recognize the beauty in every phase and stage of who we are. (Photo from Stock Photos from Lia_t/Shutterstock)

The year has come to a close and I have yet to declutter worksheets brought home over the last three months. I know many parents find themselves facing a common dilemma: what to do with the endless stacks of school worksheets that have accumulated over the months. Worry not, for we have the perfect solution to help you breeze through this end-of-year organizational task! Step 1: Sort and Prioritize Start by gathering all the worksheets from different subjects and sorting them into categories. You can create piles for each subject or organize them by date to easily track the progress throughout the year. Prioritize the worksheets based on their importance and relevance, making it easier to decide what to keep and what to let go. Step 2: Declutter and Recycle Now, it’s time to declutter! Go through each pile of worksheets and eliminate any duplicates or unnecessary papers. Encourage your kids to join in on the fun by involving them in the decision-making process. You can recycle the papers that are no longer needed, teaching your kids the importance of sustainability and organization. Step 3: Create a Keepsake Folder Select the most valuable and memorable worksheets to create a keepsake folder. These can include special projects, artwork, or assignments that hold sentimental value. By preserving these precious memories, you can create a tangible reminder of your child's growth and achievements throughout the school year. Step 4: Go Digital In this digital age, why not digitize your child's school worksheets? Scan important papers and save them in organized folders on your computer or cloud storage. This not only saves physical space but also ensures that these memories are safely preserved for years to come. Step 5: Celebrate It is now complete and we can now celebrate the sense of accomplishment that comes with a year well spent and the memories made along the way. With these simple steps, organizing your kids' school worksheets at the end of the year doesn't have to be a daunting task. By following our enthusiastic guide, you can turn this chore into a fun and rewarding activity that brings the whole family together. So, grab those papers, put on your organizing hat, and let's make this end-of-year cleanup a breeze! Happy organizing!

Family dinners are usually planned around here, but when a request is made for fried chicken is made, I totally give in. Fried chicken – the ultimate comfort food that brings warmth and satisfaction with every crunchy bite. As much as I hate deep frying anything—terrified of oil splatters—I will throw down for some good home-made fried chicken. So when I make my delectable, star of the show fried chicken makes an appearance, my family drools every time. Let's dive into creating the most mouthwatering fried chicken with a side of noodles. The Chicken Recipe To embark on this flavorful journey, you'll need the following ingredients: Chicken pieces  – whether you prefer drumsticks, thighs, or wings, make sure they are fresh and skin-on for that extra crispiness. Eggs -  beaten for dipping after moisture has been removed with a first coat of flour. Flour  – the base for the crispy coating. Seasonings  – a blend of salt, pepper, paprika, garlic powder, and any other spices of your choice. I also throw in a Sazon  occasionally into both the marinated meat and the flour for color and flavor. Instructions: Marinate : Add seasonings to the meat and let it marinate for at least 1 hour. First Coat : In a separate bowl, mix flour with your desired seasoning. Add 1/3 of the flour mix in another bowl. Remove each piece of chicken and coat lightly with the seasoned flour mixture to absorb moisture. Egg coat  : Dip in beaten eggs. Second Coat  For an extra crispy crust, double dip the chicken back into the flour. Fry : Heat oil in a deep skillet or fryer to 350°F. Carefully place the coated chicken pieces into the hot oil, ensuring not to overcrowd the pan. Fry until golden brown and cooked through, about 15-20 minutes depending on the size of the pieces. (I double fry.) Enjoy : Once the chicken reaches a crispy perfection, let it rest on a wire rack to maintain its crunchiness. Serve hot and watch it disappear within moments! Here are some pro tips to elevate your fried chicken game: Double Fry : For an ultra-crispy crust, try double-frying the chicken. Fry it once to cook the meat and again to achieve maximum crunchiness. Dipping Sauces : Pair your fried chicken with a variety of dipping sauces like honey mustard, ranch, or a spicy barbecue sauce. The contrast of flavors will take your meal to the next level. Noodles Now, that the chicken is done, let's get to this simple noodle dish. Noodles : Any noodles of your choice and cook based on instructions. I opted for glass noodles. Seasonings : Miso and chicken base . Vegetables : Your choice of vegetables. Instructions: Cook pasta : Follow instructions on packaging. Chop vegetables : prepare vegetables. Sautée : heat oil and add in miso, chicken base and vegetables that need to be cooked. Add noodles and mix thoroughly. Now, it's your turn to share your fried chicken success stories. What are your secret ingredients or techniques for achieving the perfect crunch? Let's keep the conversation sizzling in the comments below! Let's fry on and savor the magic of homemade fried chicken together!

I am a self professed logophile or lexiphile. As a child, I read the dictionary for fun, even while walking to school near a busy highway. Not the smartest, but true. Reading for pleasure is something I don’t get to enjoy as frequently as I would like to lately, but I take great pleasure in viewing the daily Instagram posts from three word enthusiasts. Add the visuals and sounds and I feel like I’m in heaven for a few seconds everyday. If you’re a logophile/lexiphile, here are three accounts you should be better acquainted with to bring you a daily dose of joy. 1. Botanical Rituals 2. TheWordMeanings 3. Aesthetic_logophile To the new and soothing new words you will encounter daily. Enjoy and please feel free to recommend more.

With Mom visiting, I wanted to continue showing her some of the best of what upstate NY has to offer. One of the places on my bucket list for this summer is Lake George in the Adirondacks . Lake George is one of the places I heard a lot about from NYC and even more since I moved to the Capital Region. Well, that changed two days ago when we decided to pack up the car and drive 45 minutes north. If there’s sand and a shore line, it’s a beach. On the way there, the girls were extremely excited about heading to the lake. I told them that we were heading to Million Dollar Beach and they were massively confused, especially my seven year old—understandably so. A lake being referred to as a beach required some explanation I guess I did a good job, because everyone understood. Part of my conclusion was, “If there’s sand and a shore line, it’s a beach.” As we emerged from the towering trees, we came upon the most striking lake view that reminded me of Marigot Beach in my island home Saint Lucia . It was indeed a view I did not expect, and I was more than pleasantly surprised. My mother was gobsmacked. She ended up calling my stepdad for a video chat to show how beautiful the lake is. The girls were also eager to get in the water. A sweet couple offered their picnic table and bench that they were done using. He warned us about the aggressive seagulls that began surrounding us. We sat and tried having lunch, but the seagulls were quickly becoming a distraction. The girls were initially afraid, but with a few lessons on gently shooing and showing them that the birds were more intimidated by them, they got the hang of it. I was so smitten by the view, that I went in and out of noticing my children chasing seagulls. We enjoyed the stunning views and seeing the steam boat Lac du Saint Sacrement cruise line in the far distance. After taking a break from lunch, we enjoyed time in the water. About three hours later, we packed up and headed home. My daughters said this was one of the best days ever. This day definitely deserves a repeat.

I was having a conversation with an old friend who expressed how blessed he feels to be able to travel all over the world. I absolutely love when people reap the benefits of their labor and get to live out their wildest dreams. It is beautiful and should be celebrated. I also know that blessings are not just the positive physical manifestations of our goals. So I responded that I am happy that he has had these amazing experiences. I also noted that being able to travel the world is not simply a blessing, but having the means and ability to do so . A few years ago, I had a similar conversation with another friend who mentioned that if someone doesn’t have a passport, it’s because they’re not putting in the effort to explore and adjust their life. I initially took it as a joke and said, we both come from a small island and not everyone has the means to do so. I also said, “You’re making that [insert company name] money.” He took offense to me stating the obvious. It was like, how dare I state that he has more means to do so. It was baffling and I left that conversation there. We haven’t spoken since. A cliché I have noticed the word blessed has become such a cultural cliché for every successful moment in life and nowhere is it more apparent than on social media. A simple search of #blessed results in millions of tags that will leave you bewildered. It has been attached to everything from gaining that great summer body, to a vacation, a new house or job, a new car and everything in between. We have conflated success or positive outcomes with being blessed , so these #blessed posts come off as reductive and materialistic, deviating from the authentic meaning of being blessed. This is the moment when I ask myself “ Do people really understand what it means to be blessed?” Blessings aren’t always visible nor do they always bring joy. Blessings in the awful In The Lives We Actually Have: 100 Blessings for Imperfect Days , by Kate Bowler and Jessica Richie, the language of blessings is described as “that strange mixture of awful and divine experiences in our lives.” Yes awful and divine . When we think of blessings, we tend to think of things we can see that invoke joy and contentment, but rarely to we think of the blessings that we cannot see or that bring discomfort. Blessings can emerge from painful events. It is not something that we tend to think of or like to discuss regarding blessings. These situations are not blessings in and of themselves, but are conduits for blessings in our lives. Sometimes awful situations are just that, awful, but sometimes they force us to pivot by confronting our limitations and learn a new way of thinking. Human beings are creatures of habit, don’t sometimes takes things being shaken up to force us to walk into our blessings. You see, not getting that job or promotion can be a blessing, not getting in a relationship with that person can be a blessing, not going to that particular event where chaos ensued is a blessing. Blessings aren’t always visible nor do they always emerge from a place of contentment and joy. It can follow adversity. It also solidifies the belief that what is meant for you will be for you . Blessings in the ordinary We observe or hear of the lives of others and may want to live vicariously through them. In aspiring for these extraordinary experiences, we overlook the simple yet profound blessings in our everyday lives. These small moments of joy, peace, and connection are the threads that weave together well-lived life. Recognizing and appreciating the blessings in the ordinary can transform our perspective, filling our days with gratitude and contentment. “Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” — Robert Brault There is so much to appreciate in our day to day, mundane lives. It holds a certain sacredness that far too often we miss out on. Being present and finding beauty in the simple things are attributes of blessings. You may not be able to hop on a flight every couple of months, or attend those amazing parties and have the amazing home that you see on full display, but you can be grateful and bask in having a supportive and loving partner, a family that loves and respects you, children who make you proud among other things. Your ordinary life is a blessing. There are also the simpler things like having a cup of coffee or tea that doesn’t have to be reheated five time, a lazy morning in bed alone or with the one you love, a walk through nature, the sound of soothing raindrops against your window pane. The list can go on. The ordinary moments of our lives are filled with extraordinary blessings waiting to be acknowledged. Let’s take the time to appreciate the blessings in the ordinary, for they are the true treasures of our everyday existence.

With the eventful week and a visit from mom, we plan on taking it easy. I put together a pool day for my girls and some of their classmates. I am doing my best to foster relationships with their new friends, considering that this move has been a lot on us all. Dad asked about the plans for tomorrow. He also asked "How come you're the one always putting effort to invite others?' I answered that a few parents have made the effort to invite us, so I will make the effort. I have also had one or two parents who I have extended invitations to and gotten no response. This comes with the territory of making friendships. I expect no less. I reminded him that I do it for them. I also use these as teachable moments for my children. One day, my younger daughter came home with a note from her friend with the number to both her parents so that they can arrange a play date. My daughter gave her classmate the impression that we were moving. Kids! They make up stories from small pieces of information. So I decided to reach out to the mom. The message was brief. I stated the move was a misunderstanding, but I would like to arrange a play date soon. The response was, "Ok!! That's great to hear. I'll let her know." I informed my daughter that I reached out to her friend's mom and I haven't heard back. I circled back to my daughter and said that sometimes when making new friends, people may not receive us the way we want and that is okay. We will eventually find our people. As the adult, I also know that we all live our own lives with our own problems. It is okay to cut people some slack and show them grace. I plan to continue doing just that and have fun with the beautiful people who show up for us. Looking forward to finding our people and having fun with our new friends tomorrow. I wish you a great weekend with people who want to show up for and with you.

Everywhere you look, someone is encouraging you to purchase something you more than likely do not need. Overconsumption is a major issue globally, leading to cluttered homes, wasted resources, and unnecessary expenses. Adopting mindful habits can help you prevent overconsumption and create a more sustainable and organized living space. Here are ten habits to start implementing today: 1. Use few organizing items Overconsumption has been rebranded as organized and cute. Those restocking videos are the embodiment of overconsumption making them unrealistic and costly. Learn how to organize your space without the use of expensive organizing items and help the planet in the process. 2. Select timeless decor Purchase items that are versatile for year-round use, adapting them as needed for different seasons. While it’s tempting to decorate for every holiday, focus on acquiring a few accent pieces. This habit curbs impulse buying and ensures you only obtain things you truly need or genuinely desire. 3. Declutter Regularly Set aside time each month to declutter your home. Go through your belongings and donate, recycle, or discard items you no longer use or need. Regular decluttering, especially in small spaces help you keep track of what you own and prevents you from accumulating unnecessary items. 4. Thrift By choosing secondhand items, you extend the lifecycle of products. Thrift stores offer a wide variety of unique and affordable options, allowing you to find quality pieces. Being mindful of your purchases not only benefits the environment but also promotes sustainable living and thoughtful consumption habits. 5. Repurpose and Reuse Before discarding items, think about how they can be repurposed or reused. Glass jars can be used for storage, old clothes that cannot be donated can become cleaning rags, and furniture can be refurbished. All it takes is a little creative thinking to reduces waste. 6. Create a Shopping List Get in the habit of writing down items as soon as you notice they are finished, or when the need arises on your phone or any other writing tool. This will create an up-to-date shopping list before running your errands. Stick to the list to avoid impulse buys and unnecessary items. This simple habit can significantly reduce overconsumption and save you money. 7. Cook at Home Frequent dining out or ordering takeout often results in food waste and excessive packaging. Cooking at home more often than not, allows you to better control portions and ingredients, reducing food waste and fostering healthier eating habits. It’s a win win. 8. Limit Single-Use Products Reduce your reliance on single-use products like plastic bags, disposable utensils, and paper towels as much as you can. Opt for reusable alternatives such as reusable bags, metal cutlery, and cloth napkins. This habit significantly cuts down on waste. 9. Be Mindful of Energy Use Overconsumption isn't limited to physical items. Be mindful of your energy use by turning off lights, unplugging devices when not in use, and using energy-efficient appliances. Reducing energy consumption lowers utility bills and your carbon footprint. 10. Educate Yourself and Your Family Learn about the environmental and financial impacts of overconsumption. Share this knowledge with your family and encourage everyone to adopt mindful habits. Being informed empowers you to make better choices and foster a culture of sustainability at home. You have to be mindful and intentional about overconsumption. By adopting these ten habits, you can create a more sustainable lifestyle, reduce waste, and enjoy a clutter-free home. Small changes can make a big difference, leading to a more fulfilling and environmentally-friendly way of living.

If you've been here long enough, you know that I love to bake. It is the skill that brings me the greatest joy. At one point, I considered starting a cake decorating business, and it was during that time I developed recipes for these six amazing cake recipes. Sweet Potato Cake with Maple Frosting This cake is deliciously moist and I enjoy having it anytime, especially starting in fall. Sprinkle a little pumpkin spice and it suits the holidays perfectly. It is always a hit when I make it. Mango cake with lemon frosting and mango coulis If you hate mangoes, I have nothing to say to you, because this is my absolute favorite fruit. I had to create something that reminds me of the tropical island I grew up on. I packed as much fresh mangoes as I could into that recipe. The only other flavor that would balance this recipe was a lemon frosting. But I didn't stop there with the mango. I topped it with a mango coulis and balanced the sweetness with a sprinkle of Trader Joe's Chile Lime seasoning . Bailey's Irish Cream cake and frosting If you're into the subtle smoothness of Bailey's Irish Cream, this will be your kind of dessert. Double the richness by infusing both the cake and frosting with Irish cream and you're in for an amazing sweet treat. Don't relegate this to St. Patrick's Day only, but every morsel is worth savoring any day of the year. Chocolate cake with Nutella frosting I will admit that chocolate was not one of my favorite flavors until I played around with this delightfully delicious and light chocolate cake infused with a small amount of coffee. The cake was topped with Nutella frosting of varying intensities. Another great combination. Brazilian carrot cake with cream cheese frosting Even if you're not a fan of carrot cake, this carrot cake is a must try. Brazilians got it right with this subtle flavored carrot. Traditionally, it is topped with chocolate sauce, but I went the American route with a cream cheese frosting. If America and Brazil had a dessert baby, this is it. This is one of my daughter's favorite cakes and something you can enjoy at any time of day. Red velvet cake and vanilla frosting Last but not least is a red velvet cake, a dessert established in Southern American culture. The use of buttermilk to increase the natural tanginess and acidity makes this cake worth learning to bake. The more I baked this cake, the more I appreciated the long history of the red velvet cake. Enjoy this cake on a lazy afternoon with a good book. What are your favorite cake and frosting flavors?