Don't Feed the Trolls: Protect Your Peace

This week has been one, and everyone is entitled to an opinion about it. That’s the beauty of freedom of speech. But this freedom can be a double-edged sword as we have seen for sometime now. While we have the ability to share our thoughts, it becomes problematic when that freedom turns into unprovoked attacks from anonymous strangers hiding behind screens.

Unfortunately, the old advice—kill ‘em with kindness—just doesn’t work anymore.

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Some people, no matter how reasonable your response is, will always remain who they are. Trolls thrive on attention, and engaging with them often only fuels their behavior. If you do choose to respond, it’s best to keep it brief, fact-based, and logical. Resist the urge to get drawn into a prolonged exchange, because trolls deserve very little of your time. One well-reasoned statement is usually enough to make your point. Anything more than that is just feeding into their desire for attention.

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At the heart of trolling is often deep unhappiness. Happy, fulfilled people don’t need to lash out at others. Trolls are usually people dealing with their own inner turmoil, and their online behavior is often a cry for help—though a destructive one. They lash out to draw attention to their pain, seeking to inflict the same hurt they feel onto others. This behavior is less about you and more about their need for validation or control.

But here’s the thing: We don’t have to feed into it.

By refusing to engage negatively, we take away the power trolls crave. Their behavior is exhausting, and sooner or later, they will burn themselves out. If they don’t, there’s always the block button, which works wonders.

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I first encountered the darker side of online interaction when my daughter was four years old. She loved watching Ryan’s World on YouTube—a light-hearted, fun show. One day, I noticed something that shocked me: 150,000 likes, but 75,000 dislikes. I turned to her dad and said, “Can you believe that 75,000 people took time out of their day to dislike a video about hands and feet—or whatever it was?”

What struck me even more wasn’t just the number of dislikes, but the vitriol in the comment section. It wasn’t a few negative comments—it was a flood of hatred. The comments weren’t just about disliking the video; they were attacks on Ryan, his family, and anyone who dared to enjoy the content. The comment section had become a battlefield. What I was witnessing was trolling at its worst: a toxic, attention-seeking behavior aimed at a child and his family, simply because they could.

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As online communities continue to grow, trolling has become an even more pervasive issue. People who would never dream of behaving this way in face-to-face interactions often lose all social filters behind the anonymity of a screen. This leads to a breakdown in civility, with people freely unleashing their worst thoughts and behaviors.

The hallmark of a troll is the loud, unfounded opinion. They rarely contribute anything meaningful to the conversation, but they dominate with insults, criticism, and drama. When called out for their lack of substance, their go-to defense is often: “That’s just my opinion,” or “I’m entitled to my opinion.” In truth, they don’t engage in critical thinking; they’re more interested in hearing themselves talk—or worse, in gaslighting others for sport.

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It’s tempting to think that engaging with trolls will somehow set them straight or win the argument. But the reality is that trolls aren’t looking for a productive conversation. They’re looking for attention. They want to stir the pot and create conflict, because it feeds their sense of power. The best way to deal with them is to not feed into their behavior.

1. Don’t engage emotionally. Stay calm, stay rational, and if you do respond, make it a single, fact-based statement.

2. Don’t argue for the sake of arguing. If it’s clear that someone is trolling, don’t let them drag you into a debate. Remember, they’re not interested in dialogue; they’re interested in disruption.

3. Use the block button liberally. Sometimes the best way to protect your peace is to simply remove the toxic voices from your digital space.

Trolls will always exist in some form. The internet allows people to express themselves, but it also gives a platform to those who prefer to spread negativity. However, we don’t have to participate in their games. By choosing not to engage with trolls—or engaging with facts and logic, rather than emotion—we protect our own peace.

At the end of the day, we can’t control how others behave online, but we can control how we respond. Choose peace over drama. Choose dignity over disruption. And when in doubt, use the block button—it’s there for a reason.

Illustrations from Kaitlyn/Color Me Hapii